Thursday, September 22, 2011

God Speaks to Me II: Daily News Blog

These are the messages of God as so related to me through the various personalities of the divine.

Morons Unite!
By: God the Mean Spirited

Well, well, well. What can I say about the supposed human creation of God? How about this simple fact: There are a lot of fu*king stupid people out there in your neck of the galaxy. Let us begin...

So, this convicted criminal Troy Davis spoke with me just this morning, and what did he say? He said he cannot understand why his attorneys waited until 1994, three years after his original conviction, to try to say that witnesses had recanted their statements. The first appeals were filled with assertions that Troy did not receive a fair and equal trial (problems with the trial site and the jury selection) and that defense attorneys did not provide effective counsel. Why did counsel wait so long to assert that  witnesses were tainted? Maybe they didn't know? Possible. If so, why did counsel for Troy try to challenge the conviction in 2000, citing that the use of the ole electric chair was cruel and unusual punishment? Did they really believe in his innocence, or were they simply trying whatever they thought might work to either overturn his conviction or commute his death sentence to life? Do they understand that these actions did not help to cement the idea that there may have indeed been credible doubt? Do they know what CREDIBLE doubt is? Not all doubt is credible, do they understand this?

And how can I not mention something about the idiot 'hikers' who were finally released from Iran? Not much, except that they are idiots. Who the hell goes hiking in IRAN? Hell, why not go on a picnic or camping excursion in Afghanistan? Sure. I'll make the sandwiches and you make the fruit punch. If people are dumb enough to go hiking in Iran and get caught, shit, let their dumb asses stay there. Why would you want people that stupid in your country anyways? Don't let them back into your country where they will get married, procreate, and make MORE stupid people.

Ohhhhh, Mr. Obungle. Well, why don't you do everyone on your planet a favor and STOP trying to pretend you know what the hell you are doing in politics, humm? Your voon-der-bar election slogan of "Yes We Can!" apparently only refers to getting into more debt, fighting more useless wars, getting into more debt, demolishing the economy, getting into more debt, bungling healthcare reform, getting into more debt, growing the unemployment percentage as if it were a garden perennial, and...that's right...getting into more debt. By the way, Mr. Obungle, you seriously need to do something about the people you have making up your little propaganda stories that are supposed to make you look good, because they aren't very good, aren't believable, and only make you look worse. Fire them. Get better writers. Hell, hire Stephen King! Just about everything he writes is a bestseller! 

Yay! Government shut down! It reminds me of the winter months when there are loads of snow in some areas of your planet and all the kids are hoping for school to be cancelled...except it never is. Stop getting the hopes of the nation up by saying there is going to be this big damn government shut down...and then pulling the plug on pulling the plug. It is emotional trauma. Pull the goddamn cord and get it over with. Use it as a tool with which to get rid of all the crap politicians. Just don't replace the idiots with more idiots as this will not help your country.

You humans in the United States want to help your debt situation? Hey, you politicians who never pray but should, forgive some of the debt to the middle and lower classes and extend them business credits, give them their homes (and I do mean GIVE) and forgive their education debts with the chance to pursue even greater education goals. Give colleges and universities credits, give home building companies credits. Forgive debts to countries that will forgive your debt in return. Get as close as possible to starting from financial scratch, set the numbers at zero and extend credit. Get people back to learning, earning, building, and buying.

And stop giving a flying fu*k what that freak Ahmadinejad has to say. Don't you get it? Dude is beyond nuts, and he is going to continue to say crazy shit because he KNOWS it bugs the shit out of you. So STOP listening to the little freak and inviting him places. No one fu*king wants to hear his useless rhetoric anyways. Let his own people remove his dumb ass from political power. Stop involving yourselves with trying to solve problems that are not your goddamn problem, geeze.

Texas. Look, did God bless you? I suppose so. I admire your fervent desire to get the gravy train of the justice system moving by clearing out Death Row. HOWEVER, you have got to make sure the guys you put to death are really guilty, alright? You, too, Georgia. And all you people inside and outside of the justice system stop making race an issue in goddamn everything you possibly can. Let the evidence speak. By the way, the color of one's skin should NEVER be evidence, got it? If the fu*ker is guilty the evidence will say so...not their ethnicity or any kind of crap-doodle like that. Race is old goddamn news. Get over it.

Tea Party, you can take a friggin' hike. The United States is a coffee drinking nation anyways, or didn't you know that?

Mr. Obungle, thank JESUS you are not the coach of my favorite NFL team, because your plans SUCK!

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